I leave her behind now, sad faced and crying
On a lonely road, alone, without me.
She scuffs along, lingering in past moments and places,
savoring shadows and refreshing desires.
While I move on to new pastures; unsure; but not looking back at all.
“Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself,
take up his cross, and follow me.”
Gospel of Matthew
What is Jesus saying to us in this seemingly straightforward message, one that sends terror through the hearts of many. At one level He tells us that our thoughts matter, what we think can lead us to good or evil, once we dwell on those thoughts we turn them from thoughts to desires, and desires eventually turn into passions that we act on.
These thoughts can be good or bad, if they are temptations, as those in the Gospel today, Jesus tells us to throw them out and get rid of them. What is in our heart is what will join or separate ourselves from God. Jesus does not make it simple, even marriage is forever, an almost alien concept in today’s secular society.
Jesus wants us to have an interior dedication to Him in our hearts that will shine through in our daily lives to all others around us. Appearing to be good is not the same as being good in our hearts. It is not enough for Him, he wants all of us.
Staring into the blackness, thoughts extinguish themselves,
as embers to charcoal, invisible in the dark.
A soul prays the prayer of no words, pleading for signs,
throwing out daily turbulence.
Out of the darkness, shapes emerge,
first unrecognizable, then taking form.
Distractions, sins, temptations, possessions, desires, things of no import, golden calves,
all gathered up and gently carried to His door.
Returned goods welcomed with forgiveness and love,
and more journeys are made, back into dazzling darkness,
Searching for it which must be returned, each trip a little lighter,
in order to drink from the Chalice of peace and love again;
And to rest In Him.
Copyright 2013 Michael J. Cunningham
Daily prayers and meditations 